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Metal Health

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In Mental Wellness

Real Talk: Loving What You See in the Mirror

In Mental Wellness 5 Mins Read

The Moment My Self-Love Journey Began

Back in 2012, my friend Tara posted a status on Facebook called “Favorite things about me.” It was funny, bold, honest, and so unapologetically her that I could not stop smiling. It made me think about how rarely we pause to acknowledge the parts of ourselves we actually love. That moment was one of the first times I started paying attention to my own self-love journey. At that time, the world felt very focused on perfection. Filters and editing were becoming normalized, magazines were already retouching everything, and beauty standards were operating at full speed. It was exhausting.

Tara passed away during COVID in 2021, and I miss her every single day. Her voice, her humor, her energy, and the way she always spoke her truth. I am grateful I had her in my life, and I still feel her influence in the way I approach honesty and vulnerability.

Over the years, I have written about various aspects of my own self-love journey, including how I learned to prioritize myself. You can read more about that here: Putting Me First, How my wellness journey began and where it’s headed. 

If you can look in the mirror and like what you see, truly like it, that is a blessing. And you should never let anyone convince you otherwise.

My Real Talk Backstory

For years, I struggled to like what I saw in the mirror. When I was younger, I was in an accident, and both of my feet suffered third-degree burns. For my entire childhood and early adulthood, I lived terrified that someone would notice. Men talk about women’s feet the way people talk about wine. Detailed, judgmental, and full of rules. It got in my head. I convinced myself I could never be seen as beautiful. I dated to fill an emptiness I did not know how to sit with. My self-esteem lived in the basement, and my self-love journey had not even begun.

Then one day, working at Mrs. Fields Cookies in Bloomingdale’s, a co-worker said to me, “You are so pretty. No one is looking at your feet.” It sounds simple, but that sentence cracked something open. The hardest thing I have ever done in my life was not motherhood, moving, career changes, or taking risks. It was the first day I wore shoes without stockings. That was the day I walked into the world without trying to hide. No pointing, no whispering, no falling apart. Just me. I did not know it at the time, but that moment was the first real step in my self-love journey.

From that moment on, I stopped letting other people’s opinions direct my life. If someone talks about me now, that is their hobby. I like me, and that is enough. Learning to hold that truth was part of my self-love journey, too.

I believe God gives us all a plan. Mine was to learn empathy through imperfection. I do not judge people for what they look like or what they are missing. I want to know their gifts and their heart. I am not a saint. If you are wearing something ridiculous, I may judge that, but that can be fixed. My self-love journey taught me that what matters most lives far beyond appearances.

So Tara, here is my list. My favorite things about me:

• I love my body from my head to my toes
• I love my feet because they carried me through life when they easily could not have
• I love my smile, my voice, and my lips
• I embrace my voluptuous breasts (I might prefer one size down, so I did)
• I love my laugh
• I love my ability to love
• I love that I try to be a good friend
• I love my daughters and my husband
• I love my mind
• I love my sense of humor
• I love my ability to forgive
• I love that I am opinionated
• I love that I talk a lot
• I love wearing sexy dresses
• I love that I love without conditions
• I love helping people; it makes me happy
• I love that my family loves me unconditionally
• I love cooking for the people I care about

Are there areas I can improve? Of course. Staying in shape is about health now, not perfection. But my life is full of blessings. I wake up every day grateful. I thank God for my daughters and my husband, who is my rock and my number one fan.

If there is one thing I learned from Tara, it is that life is too short not to love who you are. Too short to shrink. Too short to wait for permission. Too short not to tell the truth about what makes you special.

To anyone reading, I invite you to make a list of your favorite things about yourself. Start small if you need to. Loving yourself, or even just liking yourself, can change how you move through the world.

Real talk. You deserve that.

Special thanks to my friend Tara Sharp for the inspiration. I love you, and I miss you.

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In Mental Wellness

Putting Me First: How My Wellness Journey Began and Where It’s Headed

In Mental Wellness 4 Mins Read

Real Talk: January 2018: The Moment Everything Changed

In January 2018, I made a life-changing decision; I chose me. My Wellness journey: As a mother, it’s second nature to prioritize my children above all else. For years, I poured from an empty cup, thinking self-sacrifice was the ultimate expression of love. But in October 2017, someone said something that shook me to my core. I was already grieving the death of my mother, barely holding myself together, and suddenly, I found myself spiraling.

For the next two months, I tried not to fall apart. I was hurting, but I kept showing up for everyone else. And then, with the clarity that only comes from emotional exhaustion, I knew it was time to shift.

Releasing the Guilt That Wasn’t Mine

That January, I confronted someone who had haunted my thoughts for years. I released the guilt I had lived with for far too long, because I realized it wasn’t mine to carry. That confrontation marked the beginning of my wellness journey and the start of reclaiming my peace.

Soon after, I experienced a health scare with Bell’s Palsy. While it was physically and emotionally draining, I believe the mindset work I had begun helped me recover faster. Choosing to prioritize my mental wellness made all the difference.

Five Years of Mental Work

Healing the mind is an essential part of any wellness lifestyle, and this was the part of me that needed the most attention. For five years, I worked through trauma in therapy, faced my fears, and made difficult decisions to eliminate triggers in my life. It wasn’t easy, but it was necessary.

2023: A Year of Awareness and Awakening

In 2023, everything changed again. I was diagnosed with sleep apnea. That diagnosis explained so much. For years, I had struggled with fatigue, brain fog, mood swings, and stubborn weight gain, even when I thought I was doing everything “right.”

Sleep apnea can wreak havoc on your health. The lack of quality sleep affects metabolism, hormone balance, memory, and weight. Once I began treatment, I finally started to feel like myself again. My energy returned. My focus improved. And the scale started to move, not because I starved myself, but because my body was finally functioning as it should.

Starting My Fitness Journey

With my sleep under control and my mind in a better place, I felt ready to take on a new challenge: physical fitness.

I began with a full medical evaluation to ensure I could safely begin working out. With my doctor’s clearance, I hired a coach who taught me how to heal my relationship with food and embrace strength training.

Now, two years later:

  • I work out at least three times a week. I try hard to incorporate strength training into my week at least twice a week, sometimes I forget, and sometimes I just don’t feel like working out, and that is ok. I answer only to myself.
  • I have a balanced, respectful relationship with food.
  • I’m learning to love my body through every phase.

2024: A Life-Changing Decision Breast Reduction Surgery

In 2024, I made another major decision: I had breast reduction surgery.

This was not just a cosmetic choice. It was about freedom. For years, I had experienced back and neck pain, poor posture, and physical limitations due to my breast size. After surgery, the relief was almost immediate.

I could move more freely, breathe deeper, and feel lighter, not just physically but emotionally. My workouts became easier. My confidence grew. I felt more aligned with the woman I’ve worked so hard to become.

What’s Next: The Journey Continues

My wellness journey isn’t over; it’s evolving. This year, I’m facing new challenges and goals that are stretching me in new ways. I’ll be sharing more about that as my Wellness Journey continues, so stay tuned. I’m grateful for my husband, my incredible daughters, and my best friends who have given unconditional support during these last 8 years. I am forever grateful.

Healing isn’t linear. But it’s possible. And it all begins with one choice to put you first. Real Talk, Real People

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In Hamptons Happenings

Hamptons Happenings: 2015 Mental Health Awareness Day

In Hamptons Happenings 3 Mins Read

Hamptons Happenings: 2015 Mental Health Awareness Day

12th Annual East End Mental Health Awareness Day
“Changing Times, Changing Minds”
Saturday, April 11, 2015
9:00 am – 3:00 pm
Registration begins at 9:00 am
Southampton High School – 141 Narrow Lane, Southampton, NY
Mental illness in word collage

FREE EVENT
CLICK HERE TO REGISTER

Guest Speakers

Kristie Golden, Ph. D
Associate Director of Operations, Neurosciences, at Stony Brook Medicine

Jeffrey Steigman, Psy. D
Chief Administrative Officer, Family Service League
on

The South Fork Behavioral Health Initiative
& Medicaid Redesign – Health Care Delivery System

Panel Discussion – Stories of Resilience
Richard Lawless Th. D.- Moderator
Morning Workshops:
A. The Peer Movement – the importance of peers in recovery
Tracy Puglisi, Association of Mental Health and Wellness and Elizabeth Breier, NYS Office of Mental Health

B. National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) – Support, education, advocacy and leadership Ellen Tollefsen, NAMI member

C. Inspirational Triathlon Racing i-tri – Transporting Girls to the Finish Line, Theresa Roden, Executive Director

Afternoon Workshops:
D. Substance Abuse & Mental Health Concerns in Suffolk County
Kristie Golden, Ph. D. Associate Director of Operations, Neurosciences, at Stony Brook Medicine

E. Psychopharmacology – The Fears and the Facts:
Eric J. Bartky M.D.

F. Helping in a Crisis – Symptom appropriate treatment and care
Robyn Berger-Gaston LCSW-R, ACSW
Division Director of Family Service League.

Exhibitors – All day
Coffee, Lunch & Networking

This Free Event is Co-Sponsored by
Southampton Town and East Hampton Town and Bridgehampton National Bank
For more information call (631) 702-2445

Jeffrey Steigman, Psy. D
Chief Administrative Officer, Family Service League
Jeffrey Steigman, Psy. D
Chief Administrative Officer, Family Service League

If you, a family member, or a friend are living with the effects of a mental illness, or if you have an interest in learning more about mental health issues, you should attend the annual Mental Health Awareness Day.

Mental health can take a variety of forms, trauma, depression, anxiety, and PTSD are to name but a few. Whilst there are a generous selection of treatments that can help, from attending a mental health facility for Christians to group CBT sessions, people still suffer in silence because of the many negative stigmas that surround such conditions.

Co-Sponsored by the Town of Southampton and East Hampton, the annual Mental Health Awareness Day is free, day-long event includes a panel discussion, workshops, vendors, and the opportunity to network with consumers and professionals in the field. The conference should be attended by anyone on the East End concerned with mental health issues, including consumers, community members, and professionals.

Association for Mental Health and Wellness
Suffolk County Division of Community Mental Hygiene Services

Content provided by Southampton Town Government:

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In Metal Health

HM Mental Health: When Someone You Know Struggles with Fear, Anxiety and Stress!

In Metal Health 4 Mins Read

HM Mental Health: When Someone You Know Struggles with Fear, Anxiety and Stress! What do you do when someone you know has to deal with persistent fears, anxieties, or even depression? Well the first thing you need to do is to get the person to seek the services of a professional who can lead them in the right direction and give them the help they need. In addition, here are some other techniques you can use to help the person cope. One approach is to use cannabis. This is not necessarily the correct option for everyone. In fact, some people like to use CBD or a vaporizer as this reduces the adverse effects of the substance. Dispensary supplies tend to cater to a wide range of needs. It is understandable that if you have never come across a product like this before or are considering trying this to help manage the symptoms of anxiety or stress, maybe looking at reading something like a cbdpure review, just to give you more of an idea as to what you will be getting yourself into when it comes to the use of cbd oil. Even if you have heard positives about this, it is always important to do your research, to be on the safe side. I’m sure you will find a solution to dealing with your anxiety in the best way possible.

photo credit:
photo credit: “The Mental Health Act” by Ian Smith

Learn as much as you can in managing anxiety and depression such as finding the time to talk to someone and relaxation techniques, to knowing where to buy the best strains for anxiety and learning how to take control. There are many books and information that will educate you on how to deal with fear and anxiety. Share this information with the person who is struggling. Education is the key in finding the answers your looking for in managing your fears. Be understanding and patient with the person struggling with their fears. Dealing with depression and anxiety can be difficult for the person so do not add more problems than what is already there. When trying to help someone with depression, it might be worth looking for something that can ease their symptoms, such as some medical marijuana from https://www.togoweed.ca/. That way, they should be able to manage their depression, allowing them to get on with their lives. However, in every depression or anxiety-related situation you experience, begin to learn what works, what doesn’t work, and what you need to improve on in managing your fears and anxieties. For instance, you have a lot of anxiety and you decide to take a walk to help you feel better. The next time you feel anxious you can remind yourself that you got through it the last time by taking a walk. This will give you the confidence to manage your anxiety the next time around. Another thing to remember is that things change and events do not stay the same. For instance, you may feel overwhelmed today with your anxiety and feel that this is how you will feel the rest of the week or month. This isn’t correct. No one can predict the future with one hundred percent accuracy. Even if the thing that you feared does happen there are circumstances and factors that you can’t predict which can be used to your advantage. You never know when the help and answers you are looking for will come to you. When your fears and anxieties have the best of you, seek help from a professional. The key is to be patient, take it slow, and not to give up. In time, you will be able to find those resources that will help you with your problems. BIOGRAPHY: Stan Popovich is the author of “A Layman’s Guide to Managing Fear Using Psychology, Christianity and Non Resistant Methods”. Stan’s managing fear book has become very popular with over 300 positive book reviews and counting. Please read the many book reviews of Stan’s popular book by going to Stan’s website at http://www.managingfear.com/

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In Metal Health

Managing Your Persistent Fears, Anxieties and Stress

In Metal Health 4 Mins Read

Hamptons Wellness: Managing Your Persistent Fears, Anxieties and Stress

Everybody deals with anxiety and depression, however some people have a difficult time in managing it. As a result, here is a brief list of techniques that a person can use to help manage their most persistent fears and every day anxieties.

When facing a current or upcoming task that overwhelms you with a lot of anxiety, the first thing you can do is to divide the task into a series of smaller steps. Completing these smaller tasks one at a time will make the stress more manageable and increases your chances of success.

Sometimes we get stressed out when everything happens all at once. When this happens, a person should take a deep breath and try to find something to do for a few minutes to get their mind off of the problem. A person could get some fresh air, listen to some music, or do an activity that will give them a fresh perspective on things.

Additionally, marijuana is celebrated in various parts of the world as a remedy for stress relief for its ability to improve your mood. Consequently, if you prefer to take a natural approach to managing your mental health, you might want to consider giving cannabis products a try for yourself. There is a huge variety of different cannabis strains out there such as strawberry kush that can all have potentially unique impacts on your wellbeing.

Correspondingly, if you are tempted to introduce cannabis products into your mental health toolkit, then knowing as much as possible about your chosen strain is crucial. For instance, you might find that sun rocks weed is a particularly good fit for helping you to relax and unwind if your worries are stopping you from getting to sleep. Above all, insomnia can be highly overwhelming but there are strains of cannabis out there that can be incredibly useful.

However, that being said, it is important to note that there are also different levels of marijuana quality. They are rated on a A-AAAA scale in Canada, with A being the lowest quality. Obviously you want high-quality marijuana to get the best effects. You can find out more about this on www.budexpressnow.net.

Furthermore, once you have chosen a strain that meets your expectations, you might also want to try out a few different types of accessories to find a way of using cannabis products that suits your lifestyle. For example, in recent years, dry herb pens have soared in popularity. You can learn more about dry herb pens by taking a look at this evolve-d dry herb pen manual. Needless to say, finding ways to cope is essential, even if herbal remedies are not for you.

Another technique that is very helpful is to have a small notebook of positive statements that makes you feel good. Whenever you come across an affirmation that makes you feel good, write it down in a small notebook that you can carry around with you in your pocket. Whenever you feel depressed or frustrated, open up your small notebook and read those statements. This will help to manage your negative thinking.Upset Crying Woman By The Ocean

Managing Your Persistent Fears, Anxieties and Stress

Take advantage of the help that is available around you. If possible, talk to a professional who can help you manage your depression and anxieties. They will be able to provide you with additional advice and insights on how to deal with your current problem. By talking to a professional, a person will be helping themselves in the long run because they will become better able to deal with their problems in the future. Remember that it never hurts to ask for help.

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